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Welcome to Stuff I Learned Yesterday. My name is Darrell Darnell, there is a bumblebee that visits my flowers every day at the same time and I have named him Bernard, and I believe that if you aren’t learning, you aren’t living. In today’s episode of Stuff I Learned Yesterday I share a story about a current challenge in my life.
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What I Learned Yesterday:
Today’s podcast is all about keeping it real. I’m going to keep it real, and I hope you do to. Okay, let’s start with a test. When I said that today’s episode title was called “The Flowers and the Birds” and then told you about Bernard the bumblebee, did you think that this would be another episode about my flowers? C’mon, be honest. Well, it’s not. Instead, it’s about stress.
Stress comes packaged in a lot of different varieties. For example, it comes by being unhappy with a job or relationship. It comes at the loss of income or sudden unexpected expense. It comes with unwanted health news. It even comes with good things like a new job, planning a wedding, the arrival of a baby, or planning a family vacation. The truth is, we can pretty much point a finger at anything and there’s probably a way that it could bring stress into our lives.
I wise woman once told me not to worry about the things we can control because we can control them and therefore need not worry about them. That person also told me not to worry about things we can’t control because they are out of our control and worrying about them will accomplish nothing. Having nothing left to worry about, then we can rest. Good advice, huh?
For the most part, I don’t consider myself a worryer or a stresser. But there are times when I get overwhelmed and start to stress out. I know that I should just let it go, but it’s hard. I want to know the end result. I want to be in control. I want to have security. And sometimes those things just aren’t made known to us. The truth is, even when I think I’m in control or know the future or have security, those are just false realities. They can be gone in a moment.
Here’s the situation. Are you ready? I’m not telling you this to dump my problems on you. You have enough of your own to deal with. I’m telling you these things out an attitude of transparency and so that my struggle may help you with yours. And maybe, some of you will call in, and share your methods for dealing with this stuff successfully.
I’m stressed out because of Podcast Movement. This will be my first solo presentation and I want it to be awesome. I want to wow the audience in a way that they feel like the hour they spend with me has been an hour well spent. I want them to be better when they walk out of the room than they were when they walked in. I want the people who gave me this opportunity to feel like they made the right choice. I want this to lead to other opportunities.
You see, I’ve set high expectations on this presentations. What if I fail? Stress.
Here’s another thing. Last month I didn’t have the income I needed to pay all our bills. The same goes for the month before that. Fortunately, we have money in our savings account. It’s back to school season. That means new clothes, school supplies, various school fees, allergy medicines, etc. It’s an expensive time of year. Still, we can’t keep this trend up forever. Our savings account has its limits. I think I’m on the cusp of landing some new clients that will swing my income back into the black, but I can’t be sure. Stress.
I’ve been working late nights and diligently working on a new project. It will be my first made from scratch product. I’m launching a new brand, a new website, and I have no guarantee anyone will buy it. I’ve even hired someone to help me with my production work so that I can work on this project. That seems counterintuitive considering my last stress point. I’m not sure that was the right call. Did I just sink myself? Stress.
We’re going to Hawaii. Yes, we paid for the trip already and we did it when our savings account looked fatter, but still, should we have done that? What if things don’t turn around and we need that Hawaii money for more important things? Will these thoughts haunt me the entire time I’m in Hawaii? Will it ruin my trip and thus make me regret the expense that much more? Stress.
I don’t know about you, but when I hear all of that stuff, some of it sounds like reasonable reasons to stress, and some of it sounds silly.
But let’s go back to the words of my friend. Don’t worry about the things we can control because we can control them and therefore need not worry about them. Don’t worry about things we can’t control because they are out of our control and worrying about them will accomplish nothing. Having nothing left to worry about, then we can rest.
Is that realistic, or is that just a bunch of smooth words that have no basis in reality?
Honestly, those words ring soundly true to me. In fact, they remind me of something Jesus said. Here are His words, “Do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
Here’s what I’ve learned.
Every time I’ve spent time worrying about something, it has turned out to be a waste of my time. Isn’t that remarkable? I can’t think of any worthwhile thing that has come from stress and worry.
You know what is worthwhile? Things like planning, making a decision, and moving on. I have no idea if the decisions I’ve made about my business will pay off. However, I believe they will, otherwise, I wouldn’t have made them. Each day, the best I can do is evaluate my situation, pray for wisdom, work the hardest and smartest I can, and make decisions based on those things.
All day today I’ve been stressed about things, mostly my product launch and Podcast Movement presentation. However, some friends of ours called and wanted to meet for dinner to discuss an important business opportunity. Did we have the money to eat out? Yes, but we’re really trying to be conservative right now. We talked about it and decided to go on out to dinner.
I am so glad we did.
Am I glad because the dinner discussion was incredibly valuable and thought provoking? No. Am I glad because it was great to hang out with friends? No. Am I glad because Kari and I got some time away from the kids? No. Actually all of those things are true, of course. However, I’m glad we went because it forced me to get out of my funk. It took my mind off of things that were negative and got my mind back on positive things.
Shortly after we returned home I realized that I felt much better and had more energy than I’d had all day. I felt positive and relieved. I almost didn’t even record this episode because I didn’t want to relive everything and slip back into the funk.
But then I decided that that would be selfish. This podcast is meant to inspire, motivate, educate, and entertain. If you’re in a funk, first, know you’re not alone. Next, understand that worrying won’t actually solve anything. Third, look for a change of environment that will help snap you out of the funk. Fourth, don’t allow you mind to dwell on the things that cause you to stress out. Instead, focus on the actions you can take to make a positive step, and then do those things.
I’m Darrell Darnell and this has been stuff I learned yesterday.
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