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Welcome to Stuff I Learned Yesterday. My name is Mark Des Cotes, I’m an only child with two older brothers, and I believe if you aren’t learning, you aren’t living. In today’s episode of Stuff I Learned Yesterday I share a story of miscommunication.
Today’s Fun Fact of the Day: Did you know that the expiration date on bottled water is for the actual bottle itself, and not the water inside? That makes so much more sense now that I know it.
It’s Wednesday again, and as always I’m asking for your Friday Forum submissions. But this week I’m gong a bit off script. Don’t get me wrong, I still want you to send in your stories but I also want to let you in on a little something. You know that feedback page we keep telling you about each day? The one at goldenspiralmedia.com/feedback well on that page is a section where you can type out a message to send us. Now I understand that some of you are not comfortable submitting audio for everyone to hear, and maybe you’re not on Facebook or just don’t want to share what you have to say in our Facebook group. That’s OK. However if you ever want to send Darrell, Mandy or myself a message, you can do so using the same feedback page we talk about all the time. We will not read your typewritten message on the podcast. We only accept audio format for that. But we still read every message that comes in. So if you have something to tell us, our feedback page is there for you.
Another option is the comment section for each episode. If you go to stuffilearnedyesterday.com you will be redirected to our page on Golden Spiral Media. Every episode of the podcast has its own post there. Just click on the episode you’re looking for, scroll to the bottom and leave us a message in the comment section. It’s that easy.
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What I Learned Yesterday:
As I mentioned in my intro, I like to tell people I’m an only child with two older brothers. You see, I was a bit of a happy accident as my mother used to say. When I was born my brothers were 15 and 17 years old. By the time I was 4, both had moved out, and one of them lived in another city entirely so I didn’t get to see them very often. So for the majority of my childhood I was an only child which had it’s ups and downs. On one hand I was somewhat spoiled and had privileges my older brothers never had. But on the other hand, my parents were much older now and I didn’t get to do some of the fun activities or vacations my older brothers had experienced. In the long run it all balanced out.
But that’s neither here nor there. This story is about the day my middle brother got married. It was 1978 and I was a couple of weeks shy of my 9th birthday. It was a beautiful sunny day and I remember my brother looking great in his brown tuxedo and puffy frilly white shirt. I did say it was 1978 didn’t I. I don’t remember much of the actual wedding ceremony but I do remember tearing up the dance floor at the reception. I was wearing new shoes, a camel hair sports coat and a clip on tie. I was smoking. I was also a real ladies man and all my brother’s and new sister-in-law’s girl friends kept asking me to dance.
At one point during the night a few guys called me over to their table. I had never met them before but I had been told they were college friends of my brothers and he hadn’t seen them since school. One of them asked me if I knew what type of car my brother drove. I told them he drove a Mustang. They thanked me and then the lot of them got up and left. I went back to dancing and didn’t think any more of it.
Now, maybe you’re wondering how an 8 year old boy knows what kind of car his brother, who doesn’t live at home anymore, drives. Well the answer to that is simple. You see, my mother also drove a Mustang and there were many playful debates when my brother visited as to who had the better car.
My mother drove a mint green, 1972 Mustang Coupe, whereas my brother’s, well, in truth it was my sister-in-law’s car, was a new, 1978 candy apple red coupe with a white vinyl roof. My mother would often make fun of the look of their car saying that hers was a true classic Mustang. It was all in fun.
Now, back to the wedding reception and maybe your already following where I’m going with this.
A little while later, the group of guys came back in laughing and grinning. They found my brother and told him he should be more careful with his car. When my brother asked them what they meant they just told him to go outside and have a look. That’s when my brother told them that his car wasn’t there. He knew these guys too well, had in fact pulled off quite a few pranks with them in college and had decided to park his car in the parking lot of a church several blocks away. It wasn’t even the church he was married in.
They guys looked confused. They pointed at me and said I had told them he drove a Mustang. My brother grinned at them as he told them that he did in fact drive a Mustang but had decided not to bring it that night. When the guys questioned who’s green Mustang was in the parking lot my brother lost his grin and ran outside.
These guys were good. Before long everyone from the reception was outside looking at a car that was completely, and I mean completely wrapped in toilet paper. You couldn’t see green anywhere even the tires were wrapped. The only place left open was a rectangle on the trunk where they had written “Just Married” with shaving cream. My mother was dumbfounded. It was one of the few times I’ve seen her speechless.
And that wasn’t all they had done. When my brother started tearing the toilet paper off we saw that the interior of the car was completely covered in confetti several inches thick.
My mother turned on those guys and gave them a look that only a mother knows how to give and they shrank in front of her. Everyone was so quiet. The guys looked like deer caught in headlights. And then, my mother started laughing and everyone joined in. She handed one of the boys the keys to the car and told him she wanted it washed and waxed when he brought it back, then we all went back into the reception hall and enjoyed the rest of the evening.
What did I learn?
We’re told throughout life not to be afraid to ask questions. It’s how we learn. You’ve often heard the phrase “there are no stupid questions” which is very true. You may be bewildered at times by the questions people ask, but they’re asking them because they don’t necessarily know the answer. The problem arrises when the people asking the questions pose vague questions and presume the answer given is all they need to know.
The boys at my brother’s receptions could have avoided everything by just asking me one more followup question. What colour is your brother’s car? But they didn’t, and when they found only one Mustang in the parking lot they wrongfully presumed it was his.
Whenever you’re making plans, be it for work, personal or family, you need to know the facts in order for those plans to succeed. To get the facts, you need to ask the right questions and as many questions as you can.
I was at a volleyball tournament in another city with my daughter this past weekend. In between games I made a quick run to and electronics store to buy a cable I couldn’t find in my hometown. While there I asked the ladies at the cash what’s the best way to get to Walmart. One of the ladies replied “by car, it’s much too cold outside to walk”. We laughed and then they gave me directions. But in thinking back, there was nothing wrong with the answer she gave me. It was a perfect reply to the questions I posed. And that brings home my point. Sometimes, there are many correct but different answers to one questions. In order to get the answer you’re looking for you need to make your questions are as precise as possible.
Oh yea, this is especially true when dealing with young children. Like 8 year old boys in camel hair sport coats.
By the way. The shaving cream had etched the paint on the car a bit and when my mother sold it many years later, you could still see Just Married on the trunk if you looked at just the right angle. And every once in a while, when we would turn on the vents, small pieces of confetti would still shoot out at us.
I’m Mark Des Cotes and this has been stuff I learned yesterday.
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