I’m the first to admit I obsess on things, and sometimes my obsessions are not always healthy. My video game obsessions during my bachelor years, in fact, were particularly inhibitive. It goes all the way back to my college years when I would play multi-user dungeons or MUDs, a kind of text-based adventure game, until 4am on the then burgeoning internet, which connected one college campus full of nerds like me to others around the nation. Unfortunately, my gaming obsession caused me to neglect other important areas of my life, and my sophomore year was pretty much a waste. I graduated a semester late because of it.

When I got my first apartment and began my teaching career, I moved onto massively multiplayer online roleplaying games or MMORPG’s. Starting with Lyra’s Underlight, progressing to Verant’s Everquest, and culminating with Blizzard’s World of Warcraft, I played for hours, using most of my free time to slay dragons, raid dungeons, and socialize with friends that I only knew online.

I frittered away most of my 20s with this obsession, and I know it wasn’t a good situation despite all of my rationalization about saving money by not going out drinking or vacationing or whatever. The truth was I was an introvert with no motivation to expand my life beyond the escapist activities of gaining levels, armor upgrades, and skill points. I went on two dates in the space of 9 years.

Not that it’s all that different from what I do now. Sure, I’ve shifted my focus to blogging and podcasting, but it’s still all about joining a sometimes obsessive online community, particularly within television fandoms. The people I interact with now are still obsessed with their favorite show or actors or character relationships, and I’m no different from them in my singular focus on my hobby. So what’s the difference between the two?

Well, first of all, I’m married with kids now. World of Warcraft went away after the first few dates with my wife, and I haven’t looked back since. But although I still jump from interest to interest with startling regularity, I don’t think of it as obsessing anymore with my new areas of focus. With podcasting, my obsession has become my passion, and since 2012, it has been my main hobby that has taken me to places I never would have thought possible.

I’ve gone to conventions and met great fans and fellow podcasters; I’ve interviewed actors, writers, and showrunners and visited the sets of some of my favorite shows that film in Toronto; I’ve branched off into other projects including writing entertainment news pieces, composing episodic reviews for several television shows, and even guesting on podcasts like this one, which is a complete departure for me but such a noble pursuit.

What it boils down to is that, as opposed to my video game addiction, with podcasting I feel like I’m producing something of value and even in some cases earning money doing it, and it makes me feel like I’m feeding a passion rather than indulging an obsession. I’ve made a point never to neglect a social engagement, family outing, or important commitment because of a podcast, and aside from recording from the beach a few times during our evening downtime after my daughter went to bed, I’ve pretty much always held to that resolution.

But the clearest way I can distinguish my current passions from my previous video gaming obsessions is the fact that I keep building on what came before, and connections are being made to other passions and interests I’ve had over the years. Obsessions are destructive, eating away at meaningful living, whereas passions are constructive, growing out of whatever defines who you are and making it better.

I remember when I was trying to decide what my major would be in college. I either wanted to be a teacher or a film director. I eventually majored in education and taught English for 3 years, but after I got my master’s degree, I became a library media specialist and began teaching – guess what – video production. Without even doing it on purpose, my career was steered back to the film director idea on its own volition. That’s why I’m passionate about my day job; it brought two areas of interest together that I never knew co-existed in one profession.

Well, now the same thing has happened in my hobby of podcasting. I mentioned all of the wonderful opportunities podcasting has given me, and thanks to a stray comment from fellow podcasters Wayne Henderson and Stephanie Zimmer on Facebook, another branch has sprouted. What’s my new obsession? Strange as it may sound, it’s narrating audiobooks. If that doesn’t sound all that exciting to you, remember that I work in a library and used to teach English. With my love of books and my work with my voice and producing audio for podcasts, I cannot think of a more perfect marriage between my vocational interests and my avocational passion.

I’ve been hired to narrate three short self-published books so far: a treatise on the Buddhist practice of mindfulness, a thankfully PG-13 love triangle romance, and most recently a beginner’s guide to investing. Maybe not the most exciting material, but you gotta start somewhere, right? But more importantly, I can feel that familiar stirring in my gut as a new obsession takes hold. Guys, I’m hooked.

So although this certainly illustrates what I’ve learned about the difference between passion and obsession, it’s also my oblique way of informing the Stuff I Learned Yesterday audience that I will be stepping away from this podcast for at least a season to make room in my schedule for this new venture. If I succeed in my audiobook endeavors, this may be my final bow, but if it doesn’t pan out, I’ll return to Darrell with my hat in my hand. Not that I would want you to wish for my failure, but it must be said that I may be back!

Here’s what I learned.

Obsessions can suck you into an abyss of indulgent, myopic behavior that forces you to neglect other areas of your life. It’s part of why addiction is such a dangerous thing. But if you obsess about something that brings value to your life and your interests, you’ve got to give it another name: your passion! Nurture it, let it grow, and steer it in a healthy direction. Even as you do so, you may find it takes you to places you never envisioned when you first started down that road.

Preparing for this podcast has brought up a lot of memories of stories told by my fellow SILY co-hosts, including the time when Darrell almost quit his job at the bookstore in which case he’d never have met his wife, or when John told of how he overcame an unexpected career change to build a new life as a financial advisor. It just goes to show you never know what the path of life has in store for you, but when an opportunity presents itself – you gotta grab it!

I’ve been a listener of Stuff I Learned Yesterday since the very beginning, and I’ve enjoyed listening to Darrell, Derek, Mark, Carrie, Geoff, Barb, John, and Emilee share their life experiences. They’ve inspired me as much as I’m sure they’ve inspired you as well. And even as I take a new step into the unknown, I feel that this podcast has prepared me (both as a host and as a listener) for whatever awaits me. So I say to not only my fellow hosts but also to the Stuff I Learned Yesterday community out there the following truth: I am stronger because of you.

I’m Michael Ahr, and this has been stuff I learned yesterday.

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