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Welcome to Stuff I Learned Yesterday. My name is Darrell Darnell, I’m not a big fan of cake, and I believe that if you aren’t learning, you aren’t living. In today’s episode of Stuff I Learned Yesterday I’ll share a lesson I learned while spending the weekend with my daughter in Chicago.
Friday Forum
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What I Learned Yesterday:
As I mentioned in yesterday’s episode, today’s lesson also came this past weekend while I was visiting Chicago with my daughter. One thing I didn’t mention in yesterday’s episode was that doing the meetup was not my idea. I did mention that Matthew organized the event, but I think I should clarify that the whole event was led by three Golden Spiral Media listeners, Matthew, Emilee, and Melissa.
I think it’s amazingly cool that our listeners want to hang out so much that they took it upon themselves to organize a meetup and planned to hang out whether I was there or not. In fact, last year they did that very thing. I was in Seattle and couldn’t attend the meetup they organized last year. When I found out that they were planning another event this year, I immediately started making plans to attend.
I mentioned the event during dinner one night and my daughter immediately perked up and asked if she could go too. I had already thought that it would be cool to take one of the kids with me, and Kari agreed that it was a good idea. Taking Addison along with me would serve a few purposes. First, we’re planning a trip to Hawaii next fall and our kids have never flown before. Colby seems to not really be worried about it, but Addison was a bit unsettled at the thought of her first flight being such a long one that would be over a large body of water.
Second, it would allow Addison and I have spend some dedicated time together. My kids are very different. My son is the smartest kid in his class, even after skipping a grade. He loves to read, almost always does his homework without being told, and very rarely back talks or argues. To him, arguing is not logical. He understands that as the kid in the parent/child relationship, he’s going to have to do what we ask him to do. When he thinks the request is unreasonable, he’ll usually tries to present his point of view instead of arguing…unless it involves Minecraft. Then he’ll argue.
My daughter is also very smart. She’s usually a straight A student but approaches it much differently. She only reads the minimum amount required, and that is even with an argument. She will wait to the last minute to do most of her work and will be unhappy while she does it. When she’s done, she’s happy. She’s not only happy that she’s done, but she’s happy with the work she’s done. She does not like being told what to do and still refuses to acknowledge that just because she has to do something she doesn’t want to do, that does not mean that it’s not fair. She hates to be wrong.
Addison is not only very bright, but she is incredibly creative. If her computer time is done for the day, she can usually be found in her room creating something. She loves American Girl and I think the thing she likes most is all of the doll sized knickknacks that are available. She will spend hours making detailed doll sized things. She also makes hair bows that she wears to school, and really likes fashion. She sees no point in being organized, which is quite a struggle with her mom and I as we are both very organized people. She has an endless supply of energy and sometimes it’s overwhelming trying to reason with her or argue. She is very strong willed and seems to have an endless line of excuses for any situation.
My hope was that this trip would really impact her. I hoped that the travel process would help relieve her fears about flying to Hawaii. I hoped that this trip would make her feel special as all of my attention would be on her on Friday and Sunday. My attention on Saturday would also be shared by the folks at the meetup, but she’d be getting a bunch of it then too. I also hoped that this would create an even stronger bond between us and help us both to communicate better. I want her to know that even though we argue, and even though she get’s in trouble for stuff, everything I do is motivated by my love for her and my desire for her to put others before herself and make a positive impact on society.
I wondered which moment would be her favorite. Which moment from the weekend would be the one that she would always talk about first or remember most fondly. Which moment would cause her to get most excited as it occurred? Would it be the new pizza experience? Would it be taking off or landing in the airplane? Would it be the size of Chicago’s Midway Airport? Would it be the amazing Chicago skyline? Would it be walking in to the American Girl store? Would it be the view from the top of the John Hancock Center?
We left Oklahoma City Friday afternoon and she was really nervous about the plane ride. Of course, after about a minute in the air she was over that! She was amazed by all the cars and houses and how small everything looked. The landing didn’t worry her at all. We rode the train to our hotel and then spent some time walking around the city and the Navy Pier.
Saturday morning started with breakfast with the Golden Spiral Media folks. She had a good time talking with everyone and really enjoyed the french toast. We all went and enjoyed some of Grant Park and got pictures at The Bean. We walked over to Lake Michigan and Addi loved it. She loved the view, the color of the water, trying to find things in the water, and just absorbing it all in. We then made our way up to the John Hancock Center and took the elevator to the top. The views are simply astounding. Addison loved every minute of it. We all enjoyed getting to sit for a while and stayed up there for over an hour at least.
While we were up in the tower, Addison spotted a beach nearby. It was a cold and windy day, but we all agreed that seeing the beach would be fun. As cold and windy as it was walking around the city, it was even colder, and much more windy there on the shore of Lake Michigan. I could only stand to be near the water for a few minutes. Fortunately the weather was quite bearable for someone from Minnesota like Emilee, so she and Addison stayed down near the water for quite a while. The rest of us enjoyed some conversation while Addi and Emilee built a sand castle.
Once we left the beach we walked over to the Hershey store to warm up with hot cocoa and coffee. The time soon arrived for our reservation at Lou Malnati’s Pizza and that not only meant that we’d finally be tasting some amazing pizza, we’d be meeting some new faces too. We all had a great time and ate way too much food.
The next morning we had breakfast with those who had come in from out of town as I mentioned in yesterday’s episode. Addison and I then took off for the destination she’d been waiting for, the American Girl store. She had been saving her money for months and knew what she wanted. We took our time and she got to look at anything she wanted. I have no idea how long we spent at the store but when we left it was because she was ready. At that point our plan was to take the Red Line up to the Addison station and get a picture of her with the sign. She didn’t seem as excited about that idea now as she had a couple of days before. Now she wanted to go back to the beach, so that’s what we did. It was much warmer and less windier than the previous day thankfully. We built a couple of sand castles, watched a dog catch a frisbee, and tried in vain to build a moat that would keep the waves from taking down the castle.
When the time came to head off to the airport, we walked past John Hancock Center, the American Girl Store, and the Hershey’s store. When we passed by the Apple store she asked if I wanted to go in. She was surprised when I told her no. I was surprised when she said that she didn’t want to go in either, but only asked because she thought that I would enjoy it. We eventually made our way back to the train station, Midway Airport, and back to our own beds. We both easily drifted off to sleep last night, exhausted by all that we’d experienced.
Here’s what I learned. The weekend was all that I hoped it would be. Now it didn’t suddenly make Addison see the benefit of keeping her room clean or stop arguing. But it did give us a tremendous amount of bonding time. We got to see just a fraction of what Chicago has to offer, and we loved every second of it. We enjoyed food together, making silly faces at the camera, created memories that only we share, kicked sand at each other, enjoyed stunning views and beautiful architecture, and enjoyed every moment.
And that’s the point of this story today. While Addison would tell you that her top three moments were visiting the American Girl Store, going to the top of the John Hancock Center, and playing at the beach, those moments are just the bricks. The life that happened in between those moments in the mortar that holds it all together. Life happens in everyday moments in everyday ways. Yes, sometimes those moments happen while doing something that you’ve been planning or building up to, but those are the special occasions. What types of bricks and mortar make up the structure of your life. I think we can all benefit from taking a few minutes, checking our plumb line, and making sure we’re building our lives with the best bricks and mortar possible.
I’m Darrell Darnell and this has been stuff I learned yesterday.
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